


they don't mean half as much, without you listening

by sugdensrobert



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, aaron loves his little family so much, post carbon monoxide leak, robert and aaron are soft whats new, talk of nightmares, this is just fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-06-13 12:07:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15364356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugdensrobert/pseuds/sugdensrobert
Summary: a little look into robert and aaron's first night back at the flat after previous scary events.or, aaron is a soft husband, and makes sure robert feels safe.





	they don't mean half as much, without you listening

Liv and Seb were safe and tucked up in bed, Robert more than once checking up on them. Aaron could clearly tell the whole thing had shaken Robert up a lot and it was still affecting him. Not that Aaron was completely recovered from the shock, but he managed to focus on the fact that they were all okay now, he had to shut his eyes whenever his mind drifted to visions of him taking a flight later, felt like being sick whenever he dwelled on that.

 

After everything had calmed down slightly, the police having left, and Paddy not too long after, Robert, much to Aaron’s regret, (because he should be resting), made them a meal, Aaron feeding Seb again, he found himself wanting to be close to the little boy, while also wanting Robert to have as much rest as he could possibly get. Aaron had felt all kinds of fluttery feelings while he watched his husband fuss over Liv, not dismissing her weird theories about Lachlan, but listening to her, trying to calm her down. He guessed that was getting caught up in a carbon monoxide leak together did for you. Aaron just wanted Liv to let it go, forget about it, they were all safe now that was all that mattered.

Aaron had sent Robert up minutes earlier, now coming up himself after having cleared up the kitchen. He hoped his husband would get a better night of sleep than he did last night, his nightmare waking both of them, a strange room not helping matters, Robert trashing around convinced it was happening again. Aaron managed to calm him down, wiping his tears, telling him both of them were safe, holding him close trying to hide his own teary eyes. Aaron could hardly believe Robert ended up in hospital, barely escaping death once again. Hugging him tight, whispering nothings in his hair, they managed to get back to sleep again.

 

He opened their bedroom door finding Robert sitting up in bed.

“Hey, you alright?” Aaron couldn’t help but still feel worried, he was especially wary of his husband’s dodgy lung, before he knew it he was shaking his head, his mind once again going over Robert’s near death experiences.

“Yeah.” Robert’s voice had gone kind of croaky, having talked quite a lot already today. “You?”

“Just worried.” Aaron replied honestly, sitting down on Robert’s side of the bed, reminiscent of when it was a hospital bed. He grabbed his hand, squeezing slightly, watched Robert smile at him. “How’s your breathing?”

“It’s okay.”

“You better tell me if it isn’t Rob, I am serious not messing around with this.” He felt Robert squeezing his hand now, “I know, I promise.”

Aaron kissed his forehead before standing up again, they hadn’t unpacked their overnight bag yet, he wanted it to get it done before getting into bed, making everything feel like normal again.

“Aaron, I’ll do that tomorrow” Robert said, voice weak now. He rolled his eyes at his husband, “you need your rest, it’s literally done in 5 minutes, then I am all yours again.” Robert smiled at him, real but maybe slightly strained.

 

Robert was still staring into space when he came out of the bathroom, pj’s on and teeth brushed.

“Rob.”

“Hmm”

“Are you sure you’re ok?” With only the bedside table lamps on, everything always felt more intimate, safer, warmer.

“Don’t want to have another nightmare.” Robert was avoiding his gaze. Aaron grabbed for his husband’s hand again, stroking his thumb over the back of it.

“We’re back home, that will help, you might not have one- and I am here remember?”

Robert nodded, “I know” then he signed and added “but it’s where it happened, I just can’t-“

“Robert” it was firm, but it ached Aaron all over to see Robert blaming himself, felt proud when even Liv told him to stop it. Whenever he had looked over at his husband today, he was hunched over, a sad, confused look on his face.

“It wasn’t your fault at all Robert, the flue got blocked.”

“But maybe something went wrong when I put new batteries in, and I was the one here with the building work- I should have-“

“Robert.” Aaron heard him say it to Liv this afternoon, hated seeing Robert liked that.

“Listen to me, it wasn’t your fault, I don’t want to see you beating yourself up over this. You are ok, we all are, that’s all that matters. I was so scared, when Liv woke up but you were still sleeping away.” He tried hard to blink the tears away, but knew there were loads gathered in his eyes.

“Was in it a long time.” Aaron nodded, sniffing a bit.

“It wasn’t how I wanted to welcome you back home, after you were ill.” Robert continued, putting emphasis on _you._

Aaron couldn’t help but laugh at that, it all still felt so fragile and scary but he guessed messed up forever would always ring true with them, he was happy to hear Robert laughing as well.

“Didn’t expect this to happen, wanted to look after you.”

“Well you didn’t have to anyway, because I am completely recovered, unlike you.”

There were a few seconds of silence, both of their minds wandering to how close it had been, the _what if_ Aaron had come home later. It had him taking a shaky breath.

“It’s just so, freaky-“ Robert tailed off clearly thinking the same as Aaron.

 

Robert and Liv could have inhaled so much more of it, a fatal amount, if it hadn’t been for him.

Robert thinking he was just ill and trying to sleep it off all the while…

It was horrible to think about and it went around in circles in both of their minds.

 

“I am just so thankful Seb wasn’t here.” Aaron took his hand again and guided them both down onto the bed, he squeezed Robert’s hand again, another _what if_ that was going round in his head.

“I am grateful Zak had him with Lydia and Sam-“

“It’s family innit.”

Robert nodded, he was teary eyed again and he held their hands up in the middle of them.

“I don’t think I can sleep Aaron- I don’t dare.” Aaron felt his heart break a little bit, Robert sounded so honest and fragile. It wasn’t that Robert never had nightmares, but it had been a while until last night, and it was a vivid one, a new one to add to the list.

Aaron turned around on his side facing Robert. He rubbed his shoulder and sighed not really sure what to say. “Are you tired?”

“I don’t know” Robert shrugged, well tried to in his position. Aaron nodded, it wasn’t even ridiculously late, but Robert needed his rest and Aaron just wanted to be close to him.

“Shall I bring us a cup of tea up? We can just talk and well, rest a bit.”

Robert nodded, lighting up a bit “check on-“

“Yes I will.” Aaron nodded, knowing what Robert wanted to say.

 

 

Aaron wouldn’t lie, it sounded soft but them having a late night brew in bed, when they couldn’t sleep, or just didn’t want to yet, was one of Aaron’s favourite things in life. He never thought he’d be that kind of guy, never thought Robert would like it as well but he did. As they sipped their tea, they talked about bits and bobs, trying to avoid subjects like hospitals and poison. Talk about Seb and Liv, and further plans for the summer, Aaron laughing at Robert telling him about trying to ground Liv, feeling his heart warm once more when he realised just how much Robert loved her, and some more talk about Aaron and Liv’s trip away, because in amongst all the craziness, they hadn’t even been able to talk about any of that, apart from via facetime.

Robert every so often resting his head on his shoulder, until he wanted another sip of tea. It slowly became quieter, the both of them just enjoying being close to each other.

Robert reached over to put his empty cup on Aaron’s bedside table, and then dropped himself back on the bed, clinging on tightly to Aaron. Robert occupied more space on his side of the bed than his own, but Aaron wasn’t going to complain.

His husband was now rubbing his arm, almost to calm himself down. Aaron hated that Robert was still so afraid, it wasn’t weird, because Robert was about to sleep again in the house where the leak had happened, and it was still so fresh, it was bound to affect Robert. He knew what it was like to be scared of nightmares, or to be scared of overwhelming thoughts.

 

 

He suddenly grabbed his phone, and got his pair of earphones from his bedside draw. He had to slightly push Robert off, just a bit so that there was space to move.

“Here.” He held out one of the earphones.

“What?”

“Take it.”

Robert didn’t often listen to music through earphones, often he just sang along to the radio, but Aaron loved it, when he went running he loved listening to music, but also when he was just lounging about on the couch. Robert took the earphone and Aaron opened Spotify. He had made quite a few playlists, there was one with loads of pop music on it, one he knew Liv often played when it was just her and Robert although he himself loved to play it as well just to see and hear Robert singing along with them. Seb loved that one as well, clearly taking after Robert with his love for pop music, the little boy preferring those songs to songs on some kind of baby playlist Aaron followed.

But Aaron also had a playlist for just him and Robert, in his defence it wasn’t quite as soppy as it sounded. Even though Robert liked to relate every song to them, that wasn’t what the playlist was about, as such. It was just one full of songs they liked, some of them loved by both, others not so much and the other just had to suck it up.

It was clear both of them didn’t want to and couldn’t really sleep just yet, and Aaron wanted to try and stop Robert’s but also his own wandering thoughts. Recently Robert had found some kind of weird love for listening to instrumental pop covers, and he sometimes just used it for his own personal karaoke party.

He scrolled through the playlist and put on _a thousand miles piano cover._ He saw Robert’s eyes go wide, a confused look on his face, and he saw him looking at his phone.

“But this is our playlist?”

“Yeah.”

“Since when is this on it, or did I do that and forgot-“

“Maybe I did that myself while I was in Malta.” Robert’s eyes went impossibly wider.

Aaron laughed, “I was bored alright, so I listened to them and added some to our playlist, and well I missed ya a bit didn’t I.”

“That’s soft.” Aaron tried to argue, but he guessed it was so he just shrugged. “Well aren’t ya singing to me then.”

Robert laughed, “probably not at this time, but maybe you will be lucky tomorrow eh.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

 

“Oh I love this one.” Robert all but shouted when _piano man_ came on, he held his hands in the air pretending to be playing the instruments and Aaron laughed, punching him lightly on the shoulder.

Robert seemed to love all of Aaron’s additions and often mouthed some of the lyrics. Robert was almost completely asleep when they came to the most recently added song, _make you feel my love piano cover._ Only one second in and Robert realised that yes, it was their song and he just about managed to let out a hum of agreement.

When Robert seemed to be fast asleep, Aaron took out the earphone and put his phone on Robert’s side of the bed, seeing as his husband was still occupying more of his side anyway, plus he couldn’t turn around, didn’t want to move positions for fear of waking up Robert.

He kissed Robert’s head and whispered “I love you.”

 

He fell asleep holding his husband tightly, feeling grounded in the knowledge that his little family were all safe, happy and loved.

 

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoyed it, thank you so much for reading!
> 
> x


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